Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Mystical Magical Mystery Box

A few months ago (I know! I'm a bad blogger. How can I ever meet the gold standard? I can't even blog twice a month most times.

but I digress[1].

A few months ago my wonderful lovely friend Jen (who is a proper blogger) sent me a package. In college, she used to send me mail all the time. Mostly creepy cut outs from magazines. And I don't know if I ever sent one back because I'm bad at mail or any sort of communication in a timely manner. I mean, she'd send me mail even though we were roommates. That's how awesome she is.

So I got this package.
I was instantly afraid.
As I should be.

The outside was covered in unicorns[2].
The inside was full of awesome.

Exhibit A:

I won this book via Jen's dog blog[3]. It is about a man and his house chicken. Or something like that. I haven't read it.

Exhibit B:

A walkman? Really? Without headphones? It's a good thing I have my ipod. And my old mix tapes from my first-ish boyfriend still laying around...

But it's all good! Exhibit 3

Because we didn't get a close up of the cassette tape it is "Born to be Wild" Original Artists. Original Recordings. I would like to meet an unoriginal artist, perhaps that's what a cover artist is? I dunno. I understand the wording and what it means but it's like that restaurant: Legal Seafood. It begs the question what is Illegal seafood. Probably dolphins and whales.

And no, I haven't listened to this tape yet either.

The fourth thing I got:

A space dragon killing an astroid. Pure Awesome. Look! That's my excited face and everything! For the record, space dragons are awesome; space unicorns should die.

Yup I'm gonna stop numbering these things:


Really? A box of Altoids?


I was wrong! Full of little stuff that is awesome! Look at those tiny seashells! And a monster with those floaty things so they don't drown because it can't swim!

What's next?

Socks that I haven't worn yet.

Sunglasses that make me look like Bono, but now that I have contacts again these have been coming in handy.

Urban Decay eye liner. Also very awesome and reminds me I need to actually buy makeup and stuff now that I have contacts...

Uh oh.
This last thing.

Jack had no idea what was going on when I saw this.


Granted, there are 3 other people besides me and Jen that understand the horror of Baby You. And the shenanigans that was our 3rd year of college.

Will this be sent on to a new home?
You bet your ass it will.

So that is my mystery box.
I have a slow growing one for Jen in response. So in the future we will have a sister post.

I am always up for mail though, so if you really want to send me something, feel free. I like stuff.

[1] Heh, Jen's post also says this. BECAUSE WE ARE MIND CONNECTED.
[2] Fucking Unicorns. I hate them. Except for My Little Ponies. Those are awesome.
[3] One link to her blog per blog post. Sorry Jen. Those are "my rules."